a test

Even the word gives me anxiety. It is hard to explain. A rush of adrenaline, my pulse races, my emotions swell to an uncontrollable height... as I sit, and wait for my Prof to hand over my doom. Yes! I'm talking about taking a test. Sad I must say, how I feel... somewhat delapatated. This girl has a great weakness.. and alas, I am sharing it with the world. Crazy if you think about it. This really happens to me a lot. I have a really difficult time proving my knowledge within a school setting. Even speaking up in class is difficult.. I almost have to be convicted before I open my mouth. This state is not normal.

So when I'm asked how I am... this is my reality. Of course, I will most often times slip, and say "I'm doing good, and you?" So much easier, the norm.

What a busy time... Christmas... sad really.

We have moved into our house, all showers are officially running, and we've already had our first house guest. The smell of Christmas is nearly here, as the temperature takes a nosedive; the smell of fireplaces fill my old neighborhood. I'm afraid this Christmas will be unlike the others... we're still working on finding a tree in all this mess. This is one of those tough seasons... a test.